Blog

Always Wanted to Be a Superhero? Now’s Your Chance.

March 15, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

I vacillate between moments of heartwarming solidarity and then utter disbelief at such poor decisions being made that feel like gut punches.

I fully stand by previous statements I've made while traveling this wonderful world: Americans are some of the friendliest and kindest humans out there.

It may be a bit harder to say today watching people fight over toilet paper or continue to go on bar crawls.

But I'll still say it. I may say it while gritting my teeth, but I'll continue to say it. I will, because you know what? We're better than that.

COVID-19 has busted through our proverbial American front door. Truthfully, it was at our doorstep for a while. But we've watched comfortably from afar for far too long somehow thinking our borders were immune to it. I will not dive into the data that supports much more should have been done all along as it's fruitless now. It's here.

It's here and it feels personal.

You know what, screw that. It is personal.

I wave goodbye to my ER doctor husband each day from our large front window that fills the room with just enough sunshine, welcoming spring to come visit. I watch him pull away and I wonder when he'll get infected.

His chances are higher than yours or mine.

I call my ICU nurse sister each day checking in. Her hopeful voice a reassuring comfort during this uncertain time. I hang up and wonder when she'll get infected.

Her chances are higher than yours or mine.

They may already have it. You and I may too. Collectively, we can slow the spread. No, this isn't to shit on your plans you've looked forward to for months. This is to allow the hospitals to have a fighting chance. In very basic terms, if everyone gets sick all at once, doctors will be faced with choosing lives; choosing whom gets one of the very limited ventilators, let alone beds to lay in.

Listening to doctors and scientists is something we used to do. Can we reinstate that?

There are only 46,500 medical ICU beds in the US. That number alone does not lie, we all can’t get sick at once. Car wrecks, heart attacks, surgeries, baby deliveries; those all still happen during a pandemic.

This is very real and you not coping with temporary inconveniences puts loved ones lives at risk. Is that worth it to you?

How about your friend going through chemo? Your grandparent in a nursing home? Your parents!

This is not about me, this is about we.

We, collectively. We, as Americans.

Your minor, temporary inconvenience of staying home as much as you can is taking care of we, us, the group, fellow citizens, neighbors, as a whole.

I have hope. I have hope that as information spreads, people are educated and make the proper, collectively considerate decisions.

No amount of hand sanitizer will save you when you're going out in groups, going out for elective fun, no matter how vigilant you are. You may not show symptoms for 5-11 days (or any at all) and are sharing it with others! You are testing the boundaries and saying your life and fun matters more.

Social distancing works. For those who need a visual, this is an incredible source to show how and why it's important to social distance.

One person in South Korea refused to be tested and instead went to church and a buffet lunch. One. She is the source for over 1,100 infections. No brunch or bar is worth being That Person.

Going out right now to have fun because you aren't scared is ignorance and an ugly display of elitism.

YOU may not be affected by this, but the people you infect along with way may be. I don't know about you, but I would have a hard time knowing I contributed to a scenario that looks like this:

I don’t display symptoms and give it to my immunocompromised friend who now has to go to the hospital, which is already bursting at the seams.
The hospitals get inundated with critically ill patients and doctors have to make decisions on who lives and dies.

This isn't a dress rehearsal. This isn't a snow day. This is life and death and you effectively have the chance to single handedly play a positive role in flattening the curve. Stay home as much as you can.

As my sister said, zero people want to have to be in a hospital for the next 30-60 days, whether that's for a broken leg or having a machine breathe for you. You do not want to be there in a petri-dish of infections and potential chaos.

I may joke that as a freelance writer and business owner, I’ve been training for this moment to stay at home for years.

When was the last time I showered? Have I worn these yoga pants for 2 or 15 days? Did I eat lunch?

In total honesty, this feels much different. It’s a choice I have to make for a situation I’m not (necessarily) in control of, rather than the benefit of being able to stay at home.

Social distancing is not a buzzword. It works. It protects you and the people you love.

Have those tough conversations. Ask family to FaceTime instead of coming over. Tell your parents they shouldn't be going out with friends for lunch. Your temporary uncomfortableness at those awkward talks will save lives.

Think about that, for however brief a moment.

This is your chance to make the world a better place with one simple decision after another.

This is your chance to demonstrate that other people beyond your social circle matter.

This is your chance to save lives.

I don't know about you, but I've always wanted to be a superhero.

Now's your chance.

As a side note, this isn’t the time to personally shame. This is a time to educate. If people don’t know, calmly explain and tell them. Do the best you can if your line of work doesn’t allow you to telecommute.

If you still know the risks, still see the data, still hear doctors and scientists talk about proven methods of slowing the spread and your choices today still mirror ones you made prior to this pandemic, then that is convenient ineptitude and ignorance.

Personal sacrifices I've made:

Told grandma I won't see her for at least 3 weeks
Canceled a girls night dinner
Postponed a baby shower we were hosting
Skipped a volunteer board meeting
Haven't gone to gym classes in a week, and won't for at least another 2-3 weeks (this one sucks big time guys, I get it.)
If this continues for months, we won't be able to have a party to celebrate my husband finishing residency. 13+ years of work and sacrifice … and it's a pill I'm willing to swallow for YOU.

I hope you do the same for me.

Good for Her. Not for Me.

March 1, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Scrolling through Facebook does it. Falling victim to the rabbit hole of Instagram does it too. Based on the highlight reel of life that is social media, you create a picture in your mind of exactly how someone else is living.

We know this picture isn’t accurate, right?

To solidify this fact, just know that I took 27 shots of me sipping on tea from our hotel room overlooking Yokohama Bay in Japan before I got one I thought I liked. Twenty-seven. Then I edited the one I chose! Of course, in typical Not Your Average Gal fashion, I mentioned these facts on the Instagram post to keep things real, you know, in case anyone was wondering how my life as a supermodel was going.

We see the seemingly picture-perfect life, pass judgement (or jealousy) and participate in talking about it, very often with other female friends.

“Did you see…so and so…?”

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I find myself around when these conversations are happening and they aren’t typically kind ones. (And dare I say, sometimes I catch myself participating.)

I’ve been a victim of those unkind conversations too. Full-on jealousy and eye rolling at what’s going on in this life I choose. This life I work damn hard for. This life of mine and mine alone.

It’s that toxic bullshit gossip that continues the negative undercurrent of nasty competition amongst our fellow lady gangs.

But, in an effort to combat it and rally support, I have something to fight it! Something that I’ve used many times and has stopped the gossip in its tracks.

Good for her. Not for me.

Now I’d like to give credit where credit is due and thank my therapist or some motivational book or BrenÃ© Brown or probably a saying I pinned on Pinterest in a fit of rage, but I honestly can’t remember where I heard it. So, let’s just consider this one a thought that everyone should know in the world.

That disgusting diatribe of nit-picking another woman down to her core based off of other perceptions, your perceptions, other opinions, other life experiences is so…basic. Truly.

It takes so much wasted time and energy to think about how someone else is living their life, in a way you may never ever do, and cut it down to some negative Nancy, sarcastic Sally, cryptic Cathy way. Anyone who has any sense of self at all, anyone who is self-aware, anyone who is kind, can see right through that nastiness for exactly what it is: low self esteem (or a miserable life…).

When you take the onus off the difference between your version of life and someone else’s, it’s simply comes down to a preference. A preference to take a different path or choose a different paint color or—GASP—not get stainless steel appliances.

Good for her. Not for me.

What if that difference came in the form of support, rather than disdain or judgement?

So often the way another person lives their life literally has zero effect on you. Zero. (Well, aside from my younger brother who legit has never visited me, which means I’m stuck carrying around a stupid street sign he stole as a kid that he still wants, packing it from house to house and move to move until he comes to visit or pays for shipping. THAT choice directly affects me. Butthole.)

So, if the choices another person makes does not directly affect you, it boils down to your frivolous scrutiny as to whether it fits your standards and accordingly, then your judgement. What a way to live!

We could try being cool on for size though with how another women lives. Let’s go!

She wore a bikini and isn’t thin.

Good for her. Not for me.

She posted another picture of her dog dressed up in a holiday sweater.

Good for her. Not for me.

Everyone in her family is wearing the same exact outfit for family portraits.

Good for her. Not for me.

She let her kid get the laser background in school pictures.

Good for her. Not for me. (Side note: I was SO JELLY TOAST of the kids that got the laser backgrounds in school pics.)

She doesn’t prioritize dating.

Good for her. Not for me.

She wore navy pants and a black sweater.

Good for her. Not for me.

She’s at another rally supporting a cause I don’t care about.

Good for her. Not for me.

She chose to freeze her eggs and focus on her career.

Good for her. Not for me.

She chose to delay having kids.

Good for her. Not for me.

She has an army of children.

Good for her. Not for me.

She loves Kate Spade handbags.

Good for her. Not for me.

Her house is cleaned by a cleaning company.

Good for her. Not for me.

Her husband travels for half of the month.

Good for her. Not for me.

She’s perfectly happy living in her hometown for the rest of her life.

Good for her. Not for me.

She didn’t register for her wedding.

Good for her. Not for me.

She didn’t want a bridal shower.

Good for her. Not for me.

Her kids are all named after produce.

Good for her. Not for me.

That was amazing! Can you imagine how liberating it will be to spend your time worrying about your (own damn) self?

I want this to be a rally-cry of sorts. One of undying support for women and the lives they live.

I want this to be so ingrained in our minds that it’s our first reaction when someone watches Hallmark Christmas movies pantsless, with a half-eaten bag of tortilla chips by her side, guacamole crusted to her lips and zit cream on her face. (Or so I hear…)

Good for her. Not for me.

New Feature: Not Your Average Gals (and Guys)

February 23, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Now that I've been free from the corporate world for a while, I finally had time to dedicate to this idea I've been nurturing for what seems like forever. I’ve always wanted this corner of the internet to be a fun, fearless, supportive community. I mean, duh, that’s the cornerstone of Not Your Average Gal.

The beauty of letting the gates open to the vulnerability of writing for the masses, is you meet so many like-minded individuals who say, “Oh heck yeah! Me too!” It makes the world a bit less lonely and a lot more inclusive. I’ve learned a lot about myself and the people we choose to look to for inspiration or friendship.

So, about a year ago, I reached out to women and men who I admired from either afar or knew from past and present. These wonderful people exhibited chutzpah and individuality for choosing something a bit off the standard path of life.

Not Your Average Gals are kickass, blazing-their-own-path, independent-minded, free-thinking, kind-hearted and all around wonderful humans beings.

Sort of like this person at the end of this photo from high school homecoming.

So why not feature that and share their stories? I’m not asking you, really. It’s a rhetorical question because our community loves a good voice, a kind soul and someone who speaks to leading an unconventional life that is still wonderfully fulfilling.

These trailblazers do their own thing and have done so with passion, and I think that's one of the best things in the world.Â

So, with all of that in mind, I’ll be introducing a new monthly feature around here. It will showcase some Not Your Average Gals (and Guys) that have inspired me and, in turn, I know will inspire you. It will be a quick-format Q&A, with the same questions asked of each person featured. They’ll showcase some of their favorite photos and include the things that most motivate them, give them a reason to get up in the morning, the things that melt their butter. You get the idea.

In fact, you’ll probably see a theme amongst most of them.

Zero shits given.

But, admittedly, they also offer glimpses into a space and world I haven’t been able to touch on from my perspective. Because we all have different experiences, ones that come from different lenses and adjust our intrinsic perceptions. It’s something I—hand to heart—love learning about.

For now, it will be a monthly feature. But, depending on the responses it could be something I'll do every couple weeks. This will be a fun space to comment and share our on anecdotes to life, so I’m hopeful we’ll be supportive and interact with each other. We shall see—it's an adventure!

Do you know a Not Your Average Gal or Guy? One that maybe has taken a different path or created something unique in their trailblazing glory? Let me know, so they can be featured here.

Give me the deets!

A Day in the Life of a Copywriter

February 13, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Another flight. Another airport lounge. Another day of copywriting.
(Another margarita.)

Don’t know what a copywriter is? Take a look.

As my business has grown, I’ve needed to adjust my sails and change what my day looks like to maximize quality writing time. When you run a business, there’s quite a bit that goes on beyond the task of actually putting pen to paper (or fingers to keys in this instance).

I spend a lot of time on the background stuff, like the dreaded admin work: creating invoices, making sure they’re paid, marketing my business, designing ads, editing photos, creating social media posts, responding to emails and reaching out to clients that have gone MIA.

With all that admin nonsense on the docket—which is still incredibly imperative—it’s critical to make sure I actually get to the business of writing. Thankfully, with a flexible schedule, if I’m feeling more creative at 9pm vs 9am, I can write then.

But, keeping a regular routine is important for my sanity, as well as my clients. They need to know when I’m in the office and when they can expect a response from me. Pro Tip: This does not mean you need to respond to midnight emails. Boundaries are incredibly important in business too.

Set the standard. Let them know you aren’t available for hire at 2am on Saturday. (Wait, that sounds like I’m a hooker.) I make sure my clients have at least a 2 weeks heads up when I’m out of the office on vacation. Do I need to give them the 411? Nah. The work would be done before I left the office, but it’s a nice thing called professionalism.

How many hours employees put in during the day is always a topic of contention, especially depending on which generation you’re from.

I worked at an ad agency, as a salaried employee, that still required me to clock in and clock out for the day, as well as lunch. It was used as a way to quickly look at the hours someone put in and compare it to others. The kicker was the people who “stayed late” were often watching YouTube or doing their own personal online errands. The employees who put their head down and banged out work, came in on time and left on time were looked at as not putting in enough time. Then those work horses were saddled with more work because they clearly didn’t have enough to do if they were leaving on time. It was garbage.

Did you know that most employees who work 8-hour days only complete about 3 hours of work? That’s right, you’re only productive for about 3 hours a day! I’m not surprised. Keeping people chained to their desks is a great way to portray a busy, collaborative facade, not necessarily a productive one.

Are there legitimate late nights and really long days and weeks? Absolutely. Those are part of the territory in marketing. But an employee’s worth is not tied to the time they clock out and it certainly does not represent their productivity.

So, if you were to ask me years ago that my day would look this flexible and productive, I would have belly-snort-laughed at you.

My regular routine, day-in-the-life-of-this-copywriter-rockstar, looks a bit like this.

Mornings

Depending on my gym classes, I’ll be up between 6:30am – 7:45am. Ideally, I’d like to be up at the same time every day regardless of my gym schedule. (I’m working on this adult thing, okay?)

I do circuit training, yoga, run or walk depending how my achilles tendon is behaving that day. From there, I come home, make some coffee and sit down to look at my day. I use the Game Changer notebook and—pun intended—it’s been a game changer. I write down my top 3 priorities to get done and bang them out.

I’m in my office between 9-10 to check emails and get the admin crapadoodaloo done. (That’s a technical term.) After that, it’s diving into the process of writing for clients. Depending how much needs to be done, this could last the rest of the morning or day.

I try to schedule any personal appointments for the mornings too, which means I get it out of the way and can head back in the office soon.

Afternoons

Afternoons are set for meetings. I block off mornings on my shared client schedule to ensure that I have carved out enough time for writing. This means, when clients schedule they can choose between 1pm-5pm each day, depending on availability. If a client wants a morning meeting, I’ll happily join, but setting this standard has given me control of my workday.

Depending on the client projects I’m working on, this is also when I try to do the creative work for my own business: social media posts, editing images, setting up business goals, writing blogs and reaching out to potential clients. Working with other people around during this creative time is key! I’m lucky I found the Write Like a MOFO group—the doors for membership are open NOW—to keep me on task. (see more below)

Knowing that I’ve taken care of my client projects first-thing, means I’m confident to get my own business work done at this point. It’s been a relief.

Afternoons are also meant for errands, so I can happily avoid the 5pm-6pm bum-rush to grocery stores and Costco. Pro Tip: I’ve found 2pm on Wednesdays is the best time to go to Costco, based on my unscientific study of going there way too much.

Evenings

My evenings are the most flexible. They can take shape in a variety fo different ways:

Make a dinner for the hubster and myself if he’s actually home.
Meet friends for a quick bite.
If I didn’t get to the gym like I had hoped in the morning because my lazy butt didn’t get out of bed, I’ll head to the gym in the evening.

In a previous life, I thought the evenings were a time that I got my best writing done. But, if I were to examine it honestly, that was only because I put it off for so long, that I only had the evening to write, so I cranked something out.

If I set up my day properly, I leave the rest of the evening for awful reality television or creative personal projects not related to my business. Or, real talk, just sitting staring at the latest episode of the Great British Bake-off. If it’s an extra busy work week, I’ll do some more writing or work after 6pm. That’s the beauty of owning your own biz and schedule: flexibility.

Caveats:

Cowriting sessions – I joined Write Like a Mofo cowriting sessions and haven’t looked back. It holds me accountable and lets me see other humans (virtually) during the day. These sessions can being during the mornings or afternoons, so depending on that, I’ll readjust my schedule to accommodate.

Family – If I’m visiting family, this schedule doesn’t look the same. If my husband is struggling, I take more time to support him.

Travel – When I’m traveling, I really am good at maintaining the same hours regardless of the timezone I’m in. It was actually fairly easy while I was in Japan. Crazy, right? Ah, time travel is fun. I’m a planner, so I usually have the work that needs to be done mapped out and finished before I hit publish or make the deadline. Flexibility is key and I get some hours in during the morning and also while going to bed next to my sleeping husband.

Like everyone, my days can be a juggling act. I find that the flexibility of running my own copywriting business, can mean I don’t feel like I’m getting it all done. See what Corporate America has done? If I’m not tied to my office, I feel like I’m not productive and that’s so inaccurate.

I’ve accomplished a lot in the first years of my businesses!

Here’s to many more years of writing my heart out and 2pm Costco runs.

Need a some personality in your messaging?Â Book me as your writer.

Who are Not Your Average Gals?

February 2, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Someone who isn’t average.

Done.

But, perhaps it’s a bit more than that. Maybe you’ll even discover you’re a Not Your Average Gal?

A brief preface for those new readers amongst us. Hey—welcome, you! I started this website as a way to show off videos I produced. It was originally named Caroline Made This. Cheeky, right? As I added more blog posts, gained more readers and settled into my life as a copywriter, a rebrand was necessary.

Not Your Average Gal just felt more…me.

For most of my teenage and adult years, I had these subtle, and often not-so-subtle reminders from unsolicited opinions, that I was a bit different. I seemed to choose a path that was far from the standard guidebook to life. Sometimes it was an active decision. Sometimes it was subconsciously. Sometimes it was done while waving my middle finger.

Now, don’t let me paint an inaccurate picture. I was also a fierce rule follower, wanting to please the people who were guiding me in life. I was a good kid, great student and active in so many activities it would make your head spin. But, I wanted more.

I didn’t fit a mold. I wanted to do things myself.

In fact, my dad told a story at our wedding about how I refused to let him help me once he took my training wheels off my bike. I knew I could do it and I wanted to do it alone. He tells it better than me, but I basically shot out of the driveway, down the street like I had been a BMX biker all my life. I like to imagine I was waving the peace sign while I was doing it…

But I always had this urge to do more, see more, be more.

I needed to travel more, as in, felt it in my soul and kept a vision board of the places I’d travel. I didn’t have dreams of settling down. I laughed (ironically) at the “Live, Laugh, Love” tossed on paintings at Bed, Bath and Beyond and manufactured for the masses.

I knew I wasn’t alone. So many in this community felt the same.

Hence, Not Your Average Gal was born during my rebrand. What can I say? I like a good play on words. #copywriterproblems

Since then, it’s been a fun mix of community responses. The majority of which are positive and reaffirm we all aren’t quite so alone in this world. Something that is so desperately needed now in this divisive, often exclusionary life.

I’ve been developing a new feature on Not Your Average Gal for over a year. It’s one that I’ve been mulling around in the back of my brain for awhile, but never felt confident enough to proceed. Then I realized, what the hell? I’m Not Your Average Gal—get it done, chica!

Essentially, and without giving away too much before the big reveal, it will be all about Not Your Average Gals in our community. (Yes, just like aliens, you never know the ones that live amongst us. Dun, dun, dun.)

So, perhaps now is as good a time as ever to give you the lowdown on what the frick a Not Your Average Gal is.

In a broad definition, Not Your Average Gal deviates in some way, shape or form, from the formal standards society dictates to the masses.

This can look like many variations. In fact, I’ve broken down a few here, so you can take a quick glance and see that Not Your Average Gals are a heck of a lot more alike than what society wants you to believe.

Not Your Average Gals :

Have bodies with bumps, bellies, bulges or badass biceps. I have completed an Olympic-distance triathlon, countless 5K and 10Ks and even run 3 half-marathons and yet, I’ve been called everything from fat to big-boned to Caroline McChubberson to chubby girl to La Gordita more times than I can count. It’s total crap. This body has done some amazing things and I’m not going to hide it because it doesn’t fit some bullshit societal norm that somehow makes you uncomfortable.