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Not Your Average Gal

Not Your Average Gal

Copywriter. Content Creator. Constant Sassypants.

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Travel

The Hawaii Life: One Year in

August 5, 2021 By Caroline Peterson

It’s beyond hard to believe we moved to Hawaii over a year ago.

One year of gentle waves, coqui frogs, mild (and not-so-mild) earthquakes, a volcanic eruption and, you know, adjusting to life 4,500 miles away from our former home, in the middle of a pandemic—one that your husband is on the frontlines of—and also, just for funzies, toss in buying your first home.

Whew. 

Did you get all of that?

It honestly feels like we just moved yesterday.

I remember exactly what I wore for our 3 long flights, how I packed precisely for ginger kitty to make his Trans-Pacific flight with us and the simultaneous heaviness of saying goodbye, mixed in with pure excitement for the adventures ahead. 

Read more: COVID Travel: Flying During a Pandemic

Many lessons have been learned in this year around the sun. 

I shall indulge you now.

Take your time. Hurry up.

When we landed, we immediately started our 14-day quarantine. This sort of quarantine doesn’t exist now that COVID tests are readily available. But when we moved, we needed to sign legal paperwork when we landed that we wouldn’t leave our home for 14 days in order to prevent the spread of COVID. This isn’t isolation as most people think. This was a stay-at-home order that meant my daily walk to the (empty) mailbox was the most exciting part of our quarantine.

As evidence in my Instagram Stories.

We were not allowed to leave our property for 14 days.

Day 13 of Quarantine.
Up where there walk.
Up where they run.
Up where they play all day in the sun.
Wanderin’ free – wish I could be
Part of that world…

Island time is a very real thing here and when we did get out of quarantine, we found that need to settle into slowing down. Things have happened painfully slow at times.

Getting our DMV appointments, updating car insurance, getting a response to most anything if we had a question about policies or paperwork.

The thing is, it always worked out. Just more slowly than my mainlander heart was used to. Perhaps it’s a gentle nudge that…it always works out how it’s supposed to.

COVID connections

About 2 weeks after we got out of quarantine, Hawaii hit some of their highest COVID numbers still to date (until this past week unfortunately…) and in response, virtually, completely shut down. State parks, beaches, restaurants, most smaller retailers. All closed. We briefly saw our beautiful new hometown a bit before things closed again. We had just gone through nearly 6 months of that in Michigan, so we were as used to it as we could be by then.

Read More: 9 People Share Their Daily Pandemic Schedules

In the brief two weeks we were able to roam socially distanced, we met some of my husband’s colleagues at an outdoor get together for the two new docs that started. I remember how nervous I was because meeting new people is nerve-wracking enough, but doing it during social distancing times felt extra odd. 

*waves at a distance* 

*shouts*

HELLO! NICE TO MEET YOU! I’M CAROLINE. I’M NEW HERE.

We had just gone through some of the toughest moments of our lives in Michigan. The heaviness of the silent hugs my husband gave in our living room after intubating patient after patient will never, ever leave me. Especially when meeting new people. Especially after what we saw and went through. We wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

My suspicion about our stand-off-ish-ness at that employee welcome gathering was confirmed just recently in recounting that day. I was told they got it after Hawaii shut down. It made sense. We had already seen what they were hopefully trying to prevent by shutting down and knew we were socially distant as a precaution. 

But what happened was those kind connections I made, were put to the side for months and months as we all buckled down trying to prevent a surge on a small island in the middle of the Pacific.

What people don’t understand and my husband can talk about until he’s blue in the face, is that the small Hawaii COVID numbers don’t tell you the full story. Those numbers have to stay low. We’re limited in terms of how we could respond in even a slight surge. From the distance to the next major hospitals to resources to equipment to ICU beds to even healthcare workers. A surge here would be catastrophic. So even a small increase (or relatively low numbers in comparison to the mainland) is cause for concern. 

So, I did what I knew: settled into my work, found some new books to read, started running more consistently again and remained in contact with those close to me on the mainland until things started opening up again by the end of 2020. 

Read More: I Will No Longer Bond over Hating Our Bodies.

Our experience moving here in June of 2020 verses those who moved here even in the fall of 2020 are vastly different. They didn’t have to quarantine (with a negative COVID test) and things had relatively started opening back up a small amount as tourists were once again let in. We saw the beauty and splendor of our new home and then—BAM!

I joke with my husband that people who have moved here after us seem to have more friends. That’s partly to do with timing and also with us as well.  We didn’t feel totally comfortable until we were both partially or fully vaccinated especially because of his line of work. “My husband had another COVID case yesterday, wanna go hang out?” 

Volcanoes and earthquakes-Oh my!

2020 went out with a literal bang. Mt. KÄ«lauea erupted on the evening of December 20, 2020. We felt the initial earthquake in our living room. Did you know Hawaii has hundreds of earthquakes a year? Many aren’t noticeable. But there are some that make you think you’ve had a few too many margaritas as the world sways for a moment.

After we felt the earth shake for a bit, the hubster went to bed so his night-owl wife could watch some trash reality TV and about 20 minutes later he rushed back in to tell me the earthquake was because a volcano erupted.

Of course, we were meant to be driving past Volcanoes National Park where it was erupting the very next morning. OF COURSE. The hubster does some 24-hr calls at a hospital near that region every once and a while. 

I’ll tag along because their team has at a condo which is close to a beautiful black sand beach. It’s been a nice break from the monotony of staying home and working. I just set up shop in a different location. 

Like the mainlanders we are, we imagined lava spewing onto the roads, road closures, mass chaos and a bum rush to the hospitals. PLOT TWIST: None of that happened. We made our way down past the erupting volcano and were just gobsmacked by the power. Just the steam coming up from the park was incredible. And we were seeing this from the road! 

We went to visit KÄ«lauea during the day afterwards and found many gifts alongside the rim meant for Pele, the goddess of volcanoes, fire, and lightning. Weeks later we went to visit the beauty at night and it’s a scene I’ll never forget.

In so many instances while living here, I’m gently (or abruptly in this instance) reminded of my own naive, preconceived notions of the world. Something as seemingly scary as a volcano erupting is a sacred reminder of the land forever changing, moving and adding molten lava to this earth; telling us we are never in control, to respect the ‘aina (land).

Things aren't as expensive …except sometimes they are

The hubster and I have found that when people didn't know what to say about us moving to Hawaii, they usually made negative remarks about it. 

It's so far.

It's so expensive.

Why would you leave 9 months of grey and 3 months of cold and another 3 months of bitter cold?

So, let's dive in.

Yes, it's far. If you live on the mainland.

But a little perspective shift: it's closer for us to travel to Asia and Australia & New Zealand. It's really only an hour longer flight for us to get to the west coast from where we lived in Michigan and it's actually the same length flight from where we lived in Florida to get to the west coast. So there!

Next, the cost of living. It is a fair point, but it's not as expensive as we anticipated. 

I say this with an abundance of love and respect: it's expensive everywhere now, so examine the place you live before making wild rationalizations. By the time we moved back to Michigan for residency, it ended up being so much more expensive for groceries than it was when we lived in Florida for med school. I’m talking at least double the grocery bills. Florida and Michigan housing prices are giving anyone a run for their money right now too. 

We shipped my car and donated his before we left. (That ol' Pontiac G6 got us through med school and residency and eventually sounded like a jet engine every time it started.) So we were a bit surprised by prices the day we got out of quarantine to buy his new truck. They were about 10-15% more expensive than the mainland.

Gas is comparable to prices on the west coast, often less. Property taxes are much lower here. Income tax is higher here. Electricity is the same here for us and even better because we have solar. Plus, we have no A/C or heat so that can save us. Groceries can end up being about 15-20% more expensive depending what you buy. Anything canned and/or processed are higher costs. I even saw a spice in the spice aisle for $14/bottle. Meat can be more expensive, though we've offset that with Costco runs or buying local. Plus, we've countered costs with the bountiful (and cheap) farmers markets. Going out is similar to South Florida prices, so we aren't shocked much. Activities we love are free: hiking, swimming, running, hopefully SUP and kayaking someday soon.

We've found, ultimately, costs do tend to balance out. Some things are more expensive, some things are surprisingly less. If you live a life very dependent on everyday luxuries (oh how I miss just running to Costco for a quick 15 minute trip, rather than it being half of my day) then yes, it will be more expensive. If you're open to being flexible, the costs pan out. 

Aloha kindness

Prior to moving back to Michigan, I posted on a Facebook group for the city we were going to live inquiring about houses to rent as we weren't finding any online. Funny enough, we found the home we rented because of that friendly group.  

I did the same prior to moving to Hawaii, found a local group and posted some questions about moving there: What would you recommend keeping? What would you recommend we bring? Anything you'd like me to bring you from the mainland?

I was smacked in the face with questions about why the hell we were moving there. I was told to stay back in Michigan. Honestly? Truth be told, rightfully so. I should have done my due diligence and been more educated about COVID numbers, as well as the complex issues surrounding people moving here. 

Once I explained we both had jobs (some people move here without jobs and treat the ‘aina and ohana disrespectfully) and my husband was a physician, it seemed to warm the room a bit more. Doctors are needed here as many don't stay long due to many factors including resources, an overburdened system and sometimes missing their families back on the mainland.

What I was also naive about at the time is the deep-rooted, truthful history of Hawaii that I didn’t learn in school. It’s absolutely without a doubt my job to educate myself on the Kingdom of Hawaii; the culture, people and very valid fears they have of people who look like me when we come here.

As things open up more, I’m ready to immerse myself in that education. As I’ve stated previously, the best advice I ever got in all my advocacy work is simply this: shut up, sit back and listen. I’ve learned so much since being here by doing just that.

But, whew. That Facebook post was quite the reality check. Maybe the Aloha spirit is a thing reserved for tourists?

I found out quickly it wasn't. 

A woman saw my post on Facebook and reached out to me mentioning her husband was a doctor too. Turns out, we met him while interviewing and he actually works with my huband! The first day we landed, without a way to return our rental car (we weren't allowed to Uber to get us to our new rental home because of COVID restrictions), they showed up on our doorstep, N95 masks and all, asked for the keys and returned it without hesitation. They even brought us alcohol. ALOOOOOOHA indeed.

She's now my pal that comes around to pick fruit off our trees to bake tasty treats or brew beer and funny enough, they live down the road from our new home.

Through the power of Instagram, I also met one of the kindest people in the world. I started following Living Hilo Style before we even moved because HELLO, she posts a lot about the delicious food in our new home. 

We started chatting via DM and she offered the best recommendations for restaurants, delivery, parks to hang out at and even a bakery to get the hubster's birthday pie. When I saw she was volunteering at vaccine clinics, something I wanted to do but was told I needed a medical background, I asked if they needed more volunteers and they did! So we got to meet in person, where she's introduced me to—hand to heart—some of the best people. I've had so many laughs at the clinics and met so many wonderful people in our community that it really reminded me why an introvert like me can benefit from meeting wonderful people.

The Aloha spirit is indeed alive and well.


As I sit out on our back lanai (that’s what we call our back deck now, you know?) listening to the birds chip and the sun peek through palm trees (oh my god we have palm trees!), I’m having another pinch me moment.

My forever work buddy (and laziest intern alive) enjoys his new view too.

They happen quite often here.

So many times the hubster and I will be driving, sitting silently and peering out the window at our beautiful town, until one of us says, “Can you believe we live here?”

“No, I can’t.”

I’m just so damn grateful that we do.

Here’s to many more pinch me moments.

Filed Under: Musings, Travel

When the SHOULDS Start Creeping in.

February 15, 2021 By Caroline Peterson

Narrator:

We cut to the middle of the night where we find Caroline in the midst of a blissfully wonderful sleep. Windows open. Husband not snoring. Their 14-pound ginger cat nuzzled up beside her. It's as if nothing could awaken this sleeping goddess… 

<Caroline suddenly sits straight up>

Caroline:

Shit. I should set a reminder to put dinner in the Instant Pot at 2pm tomorrow. 

Narrator:

…nothing, except for the laundry list of things that should get done.

Aaaaaand scene.


The shoulds are a real thing!

The shoulds wake us up in the middle of the night. The shoulds keep us in unhealthy relationships. The shoulds put our to-do list ahead of our body begging for a break. The shoulds interrupt quality time by nagging you to answer your phone. The shoulds tell us that anything other than stainless steel appliances are lame and Dottie next door will not be impressed by your renovations unless they are stainless steel, dammit! 

“That's a very bright, yellow kitchen, Caroline. When will you be renovating?” – Words actually spoken to me.

Phew. Did you get all that?

We're in the middle of a pandemic, in the middle of winter, after a deadly insurrection and you're worrying about the shoulds?! (Don't worry, I do too still.)

Here are some daily or weekly shoulds that run through my mind to make you feel a bit better:

  • I should get up, but my sleep sucked last night.
  • I should start dinner, but I'm mentally exhausted and just want a sandwich. 
  • I should call that person back that drains me, but I don't have the energy.
  • I should be more organized, but my desk looks like piles of pure chaos. 
  • I should be able to fit into pants I wore 2 years ago, but the pandemic puff is real.
  • I should have every minute of my day planned out to ensure maximum efficiency, but sometimes just showering is a win.
  • I should stay on track today and make sure my Macros are totally in line otherwise my whole diet is thrown off and the big bad food police will haunt my dreams and make me feel like shit.

Damn.

Let me tell you about those shoulds. NONE feel good. NONE are life changing. NONE will contribute to the moral arc of my life. 

And yet, we are all pulled into this secret societal Should Circle that somehow determines if we get a gold star for the day…or life.

Do whatever you need to do without the shoulds creeping in. 

I'm proof that life will carry on with or without you checking off the boxes of what you should be fucking doing with your life. Hello, my name is Not Your Average Gal.

If I followed those shoulds I would have had: a mortgage 10 years ago, 2.5 kids and a corporate career. I wouldn't have traveled the world, married a swell med student in England, started my own business or moved to Hawaii. 

Now, those high and mighty, playing-Devil's-advocate types may feel like, “But I have done everything I should in life and it pains me to see you not doing it…and enjoying it,”They may feel compelled to chime in.

So before they say it: Yes, there are things that we should all do in order to remain hygienic and healthy. 

We know that. 

We should care for one another, nourish our bodies, study and educate ourselves, go to work in whatever form that looks like, get the rest we need and put on deodorant. Maybe even catch up on some Real Housewives.

But really, that's it. If that's what you're doing right now in the middle of a God damn pandemic—BRAVO!

I hope you re-read that. 

So many of my dear, fierce friends are struggling to maintain some semblance of normalcy to the point that they have a laundry list of activities that should be done, and when it doesn't happen—because hello! Pandemic—they beat themselves up. Which starts a vicious cycle of wanting to get back to normal, with the painstaking reminder that it isn't normal and cue the bad feelings of inadequacy for somehow not being able to pretend things are normal.

This won't go on forever. It feels like it.

Your new normal will not disproportionately put your child on a terrible trajectory because we all are going through it right now. 

Your new normal will not adversely affect the memories made during this time because we couldn't go on that damn vacation we were so looking forward to. (Trust me, I get that!)

Think of the resilience and compassion you are teaching your children…and yourself.

Please, be kind to yourself during the weirdest time in our lives. 

Don't let the shoulds tell you what this time should be like.

Here's what's helped me keep the shoulds at bay for the most part.

Keeping a routine is certainly helpful, but what I've found is that honoring my body and mind—instead of trudging through the shoulds—has actually helped me more. 

If I've:

  • Moved my body
  • Filled it with food
  • Gotten 6-8 hours of sleep

Then that's good enough. Full stop!

That entire list could be pelted with shoulds.

I should:

  • Have gone on a run instead of a walk
  • Have skipped the butter
  • Have gotten up at 6am 

But the more I listen, the more I allow my body and mind to rest, reset and be nourished (even if it's Mac ‘n Cheese, kiddos!) the more I actually accomplish; the more present I am. 

Isn't that sort of the point of this crazy life during this crazy time?

To be present.

To watch the colors of the sky change at sunset instead of rushing to make sure you've got dinner on the table.

A mentor of mine once said to me:

“It will all get done eventually. It will. It may not be how you envisioned it, it may not be Perfect with a capital P. But it will get done. So you may as well enjoy it while you get it done, whenever you get it done.”

I hope you can chuck the shoulds out the window. See what it feels like. How your mind reacts. How your body thanks you. How liberating it is to define your own life.

I hope you know how wonderful that feels, how wonderful you are.

That's one should that's acceptable in my book.

You should know how wonderful you are.

Filed Under: Travel

COVID Travel: Flying During a Pandemic

November 19, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Not Your Average Gal Travel

This week, I traveled alone for the first time in over a year.

It's incredibly weird leaving my well-insulated bubble of an island for the Mainland.

Truth be told, I wouldn't be traveling under normal circumstances. I don't think anyone should be traveling for funzies right now. I don't think anyone should be heading to their families for Thanksgiving (outside their normal household) either. 

There are extenuating family circumstances where I have the ability to help. I'm grateful for the flexibility my career offers that I can typically work from anywhere which means when help is needed, I'm around (typically). Don't go thinking I'm about to head across the Pacific to help with Girl Scout sales…although those Thin Mints are legit. 

I’ll also be getting two COVID tests before heading home to Hawaii.

So, as I hugged my husband goodbye when he dropped me off at the airport, I had such a mix of emotions. It's been over a year since I've traveled alone! My heart was happy. My mind was anxious. 

Ask anyone who enters an airport with me and suddenly, as if my little feet have rocket boosters, there's an extra pep in my step and I'm movin' and groovin' through airport processes. I've got all the zippers in my backpack memorized to easily glide through TSA Pre-check by popping out my Global Entry card and boarding pass in one hand and once done, zipping it back into my pre-determined compartment in the other hand. I was so excited to bop through our super tiny Kona International Airport, sit at a gate (no real lounges here), maybe grab a beer and wait for my group to be called. 

We've flown since the pandemic started. In fact, we literally moved across an ocean during it. But I had my life buddy with me then to navigate this odd, new COVID-travel world. I also had my 14 year old kitty to worry about during our nearly 20-hour travel day. 

This time, it's just me. 

As exciting as that was, I was quite anxious, and truth be told, a little rusty. 

I was always that person who would wipe down seats and windows and air vents and flight attendant buttons, but I almost sat down before I went into full disinfecting mode this time. 

Perhaps I was just excited to have a seat at the table again, so to speak.

There's something unnerving about flying over an ocean for 5-6 hours without any land mass in sight. Did you know that the Hawaiian Islands are the most isolated island chains in the world? That means anytime I leave to visit anyone, whether that be in Japan or the US, I'm making a major hike across an ocean, something we knew when we moved here, of course.

It's still a bit discombobulating to know that if there's an emergency mid-air, we have a bit to go to find some land. Not that I ever think like that. Or catastrophize anything and everything. Nope, not me.

I've flown to Australia, Thailand and Hong Kong twice, so these 5-6 hour flights are not much by comparison. 

The longer flights always give me more time to settle in. I realize that sounds odd to people who view flying as simply getting from point A to point B, but I really enjoy the experience of it. (For the most part. If people could still figure out what you can and can't bring through security that would make it infinitely better.) On longer flights, I appreciate being able to bang out some work, sip on a glass of wine, maybe watch a movie and if I'm lucky enough to have cashed in some airline miles, put that seat in full flat bed mode and catch some zzzzzs. 

I know a lot of you are curious what air travel is like currently and boy do I miss writing about travel, so lucky you—you get to join me on a day of COVID-travel! 

LEG ONE: Traveling from Kona, Hawaii to Seattle, Washington

I booked a red-eye from Kona, which is on the other side of the Big Island where we live in Hilo. It's about an hour and a half drive there, which is the furthest we've ever lived away from an airport. Our airport in Hilo is great, it's about a 10-minute drive from our home and flies to any of the Hawaiian islands on “the big planes” as my friends put it. (Meaning, they aren't puddle jumpers.) But, it didn’t offer many flights to the mainland.

So to avoid flying from Hilo to Honolulu, then to the mainland, I opted to drive to the other side of the island which has direct flights to mainland.

This avoided an extra layover, which in my mind is the safer route when traveling during a pandemic.

COVID-Travel Pro Tip: If you can, avoid (multiple) layovers. 

Kona's airport is all outdoors. Bonus for COVID-travel times. Not so much if you want to avoid getting sweaty before your 6-hour flight. But I planned for this accordingly with layers. Travel pro here, folks. 

I checked my bag and was told that TSA Pre-check was on the right side of the security line. But once I got there, I couldn't find it because people were lined up like game day outside the bars at Michigan State. There was zero social distancing. I asked someone who I saw asking the TSA employees where the pre-check line started and he pointed me to the middle of a giant group of people. 

So I made my way there and left room between me and the people in front of me, as much as I could without people using it as an invitation to cut. 

Aloha spirit, what?

The line barely moved. At all.

It should be noted, I got to the airport an hour and a half before my domestic flight, where I have Delta status that gives me access to Sky Priority lines. I also have Global Entry which gives me TSA Pre-check. Both options were painfully slow and there was little difference between the regular and priority lines. 

But, since I've lived in Hawaii for 5 months at this point, I took it in the Aloha Spirit stride because I had an hour and half before my flight. No problem, right?

Except both took so long that I literally got to the gate as they were calling Sky Priority. I'm glad I had time to get a water because I soon found out we got a small bag of munchies and tiny water for the entire flight. 

I specifically booked this flight because of the aircraft flown, a Boeing 757-200 (75S). I knew it had 3 rows in the back that were huge exit rows. Additionally, Delta is still blocking the middle seat so there was a chance I'd have the whole row to myself.

I successfully gambled as the flight was barely booked and I did have the whole row to myself! I missed being upgraded to First Class by one person. If I had, I would have been laying down in my flat bed seat enjoying all the wine and food I could get. 

But since I was in the lowly Main Cabin (I say this facetiously, people!), we got a ziplock back of a tiny water, Cheez-its and my favorite Biscoff cookie. As it was a red-eye I had already eaten and prepared to basically just sleep. 

Yes, everyone is required to and wears a mask. No, you aren’t an exception to the rule.

I disinfected all 3 seats, pulled out all my layers of clothes from my bag because exit rows are notoriously cold on long-hauls and then settled in for the 6 hours. I wrote for about 1 hour and tried to sleep the rest. I even asked the flight attendant if I could use my 6 (SIX!) Delta drink vouchers I have because—hello, we don't travel anymore—to grab a glass of wine, but he told me they aren't able to do it in the Main Cabin. 

About 10 minutes later, he came back and told me I could move up to Delta Comfort and he'd be happy to serve me there. How sweet. I asked if there were many people there and he said no. But I already had settled in and the glass of wine wasn't worth it. 

Mark the date and time as words you'll never hear me say again.

As we landed people, in general, followed social distancing rules. Delta specifically tells everyone to wait for people to get their luggage out of the overhead bins before moving forward. It's something I really hope people abide by post-COVID because nothing grinds my gears more than people barreling through to the front to avoid waiting for others in front of them to leave. (Barring a tight connection, there is no excuse for this.)

LEG TWO: Traveling from Seattle, Washington to Portland, Oregon

Thus, began my layover in Seattle.

If any of you follow me on Instagram, you remember how appalled I was when we moved to Hawaii this summer and had a layover in Seattle. It was Packed. Yes, with a capital P. Perhaps it was COVID-fatigue, perhaps because cases were lower then and people felt more comfortable not abiding by guidelines, but whatever it was, it was packed.

I was pleasantly surprised with Seattle again this time. 

Please note, it was 5 am. So that helped immensely.

COVID-Travel Pro Tip: If you can, book your flights for very early in the morning.

I headed to Terminal B where my next flight was taking off and again, happy to see people social distancing on the train to get there. 

Once I got there I saw I had about an hour to kill, so I made my way to the Delta Sky Club in Terminal A. I had not been to this one before and the lounge life geek in me was super excited to check it out. 

Once checked in, I saw the upper level mezzanine was closed and all available food options were individually packaged. In general, it was the same things you'd get during non-COVID times in the Delta Sky Club; they are just taking precautionary measures to ensure people aren't double dipping and using the same serving utensils.The Starbucks machine still worked and I grabbed a double espresso after that 6-hour red eye. Praise be!

I didn't take any pictures of my food, but for the weirdos that like to know: I got hard boiled eggs, an avocado egg breakfast sandwich and some Greek yogurt. Again, all packaged individually.

At one point, while I was eating my hard boiled eggs, a Delta agent came up to me and started to say, “Ma'am you'll need to wear…” and then she saw I was eating and stopped and smiled. I was super grateful they are monitoring people wearing masks. I wasn't offended. My freedsom hasn't been taken away. She was ensuring everyone was safe and being taken care of. 

COVID-Travel Pro Tip: You'll be asked to only take off your masks between bites and sips. Use one hand to slip your mask down and the other to eat.

I know this seems basic, but you'll want to keep each hand available, which means using your tray table or table in the lounge to keep your food on. 

I disinfected all of my area before sitting down to eat and then went to the bathroom because I love the smell of the hand wash and lotion Delta uses. (Oh yeah, and I needed pee.) Yes, as a marketer I know which brands use what scents. Delta uses Malin + Goetz and the scent takes me back to my days of traveling more regularly. 

Plus, bathroom goals!

From there, I quickly hopped into a co-writing session with my fave MOFOs and started writing this very blog. 

Then it was time to head to my gate. I was upgraded to First on this leg for my whopping 45-minute flight to Portland. 

The people in my boarding group were cognizant of 6-feet separation and again, the flight attendant handed our hand sanitizer. I got to work sanitizing my whole area again. 

When I was upgraded, I was assigned a seat in a row with 2 seats. First class on Delta's Embraer E-175 are a 1-2 seat configuration. Main Cabin is 2-2. I decided to select the side of the plane that had 1 seat. This ensured I'd be as far from people as possible. 

My flight wasn't packed at all. Everyone was spaced out well, even for a smaller plane. 

COVID-Travel Pro Tip: Many airlines are still blocking the middle seat. I would recommend going with these airlines.

Even if it's more expensive, if you have the means, having the middle seat blocked is ideal. Right now, Delta, Hawaiian and Alaska are blocking the middle seats. While air travel is still safe, you do need to take proper precautions and having that extra distance is an added benefit.

The flight was uneventful. I literally was in the air for about 12 minutes before we started our descent into Portland. 

Once we landed, people were again respectful of letting the person in front of them get their luggage out of the overhead compartment and once those people left, then getting up to get their own luggage. 

PDX was pretty empty or at least emptier than I've ever seen it before. (Check out that famous carpet.)

It was still pretty early, so I'm sure that helped with how empty it was. Most of the stores and shops were still open. They had a lot of signage about distancing, similar to Seattle.

I went to baggage claim where people were again very mindful. Please know though, because of my husband’s line of work, I'm pretty vigilant about distance and masks, so some of this may be that I'm placing myself far away from other people. 

After that, I grabbed my bag and then another coffee because when in Portland…

Overall, everything went smoothly. 

Please bear in mind: 

  1. I'm traveling alone. Traveling with kids would be significantly more stressful. 
  2. Having airline status is an added social distancing benefit I had never thought about. Upgrades and lounge access are nice ways to get away from crowds.
  3. I was on a red-eye and my layover was very early. This helped significantly with crowds. 
  4. I'm flying from a place that people are more or less flying to more often. That means my flight home to Hawaii may be more packed.

Anything I missed that you'd specifically like to know about? 

Filed Under: North America, Travel, Travel Prep

Not Your Average Gal: Falicia from FortyFive12Studios

October 7, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Not Your Average Gals are kickass, blazing-their-own-path, independent-minded, free-thinking, kind-hearted and all around wonderful humans beings. We learn a lot about ourselves from the people we choose to look to for inspiration or friendship. I'm excited to introduce you to some of them.


World, meet Falicia Ann O’Mard.

Falicia and I lived on the same dorm floor together at Michigan State University—GO GREEN!

We lived in the artsy-fartsy dorm as some of the less-than-cool people used to refer to it. Our dorm was part of the Residential College in the Arts and Humanities on campus, which meant it was filled with amazing, charismatic and creative students. Even though I wasn’t living in the dorms for that specific college and program, I benefited by being surrounded by such affection for the arts.

Fun fact: Because of the friendships made there, I worked in the Art History Library for nearly my entire time in college.

I’ve enjoyed seeing Falicia impact so many lives as an educator. When you picture the ideal teacher—one who is kind, compassionate and breathes life into learning—you’ll see Falicia.

She recently opened an online art studio that has paintings selling out like mad! I knew after seeing them and the reason behind why she started the studio that I had to ask if she’d like to be featured. Lucky for you guys, she said yes.

I’m so incredibly grateful Falicia is sharing her story with us. She absolutely is a Not Your Average Gal you’ll enjoy learning from and knowing. Let’s go!

Falicia Ann O'Mard
FortyFive12Studios Owner & Activist-Educator

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What's your passion—the thing that makes you a Not Your Average Gal?

I'm a social-justice-living, creative-spirit-having, teacher-ninja who loves to paint.

When did you start this passion?

I've been working in education for 15 years. I have been painting since I was a child. I started @fortyfive12studios during quarantine. Being cooped up at home really opened up more time to express my creative side. I've been working toward social justice inside and outside of the classroom since I moved to Atlanta in 2003.

I volunteer with Hands on Atlanta on a regular basis. Because of my consistent volunteerism over the last 17 years, I was asked to apply to be a Civic Leader. The Civic Leadership Program develops volunteers while supporting the needs of nonprofit agencies. I joined Hands On Atlanta's Civic Leadership Program in June 2016. This program was an opportunity for me to further my personal and professional development while serving the Atlanta community.

Through this program, I served as an ambassador for Hands On Atlanta. I connected people to passions and expanded the capacity of Hands On Atlanta's nonprofit partners by serving as a liaison between volunteers seeking service and nonprofits in need of volunteer managers.

I led volunteer service projects with Truly Living Well (East Point Location), which is a local organization that grows better communities by connecting people with the land through education, training, and demonstration of economic success in natural urban agriculture. I led volunteers in harvesting more than 30,000 pounds of food for the children and families in need in the poorest areas of Atlanta.

I was also selected from over 500 applicants as a Teacher-Author in the Teacher for Justice Grant Program. That means I create anti-racist and social justice resources for teachers and families. This has been my life's work so it was the perfect opportunity to share my knowledge.

The two resources that I created are now live too!  They are listed for grades 2-4 (the grant has a three grade level limit), but they are appropriate for grades K-5. 

Here's a link to each of them:

  • Creating a Socially Just Classroom Aligned with Say Something 
  • Building Classroom Community: An Anti-Racist Approach to Establishing a Social Justice Classroom

Do you make any income with your passion?

I do make income with my passion. I make income by selling my paintings and also via TeachersPayTeachers. My hope is to make enough income so that it can become my “day job.”

Do you have a “day job” that is different from your passion or business?

My day job is working as a Mathematics Instructional Specialist. I work with educators in “failing schools” to improve their craft and close academic gaps. I still work with children on a daily basis. I believe that children are the best agents for change. Though they are tiny, they have the power to change the world and it is my job as an educator to help them harness their strengths and use those passions and strengths for good. I accomplish this by incorporating real world situations into my classroom visits. I teach students about people that look like them, live like them, and/or speak like them that have changed the world. By connecting student's culture and their circumstances, the idea of impacting the world becomes a more attainable goal for the students that I work with. It also models educational activism for teachers in real time.

I not only expect students to change the world, I expect it of myself. That's why I volunteer. That's why I make the conscious decision to work at Title 1 schools. That's why, after working at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention as an Epidemiology Fellow, I left that job and returned to teaching in Atlanta Public Schools. I saw the news about the cheating scandal and I knew that I could help those students achieve at a high level without cheating. I resigned from my job at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) on a Wednesday and began teaching on Thursday. The expectation of being an agent for change is reflected in every way in my personal teaching style, the choices I've made and in the way I live my life.

What lead you to your current path? 

Growing up, my parents pushed me to be a doctor or engineer. I always knew that those career paths weren't for me. I would spend my time under the kitchen table drawing pictures after dinner while the rest of my family would watch TV. Further, I played with all of the kids in the neighborhood. My mom called me a “baby whisperer.” When I went to college, it was clear to me that I needed to follow my calling, education. Once I changed my major, I earned a 4.0 in every single college of education course. I wrote my philosophy of education at 21 years old and it still holds true. My dream then was to create a classroom full of tiny activists. I do that. Half way through my career, I took a detour and earned a Master of Public Health in Reproductive Health and Population Studies from Emory University. I worked at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention for 4 years in the Division of Reproductive Health. The entire time I was working there, my heart kept calling me back to teaching.

Teaching is so rewarding, but comes with a lot of stress. Educating and loving other people’s children is an honor and I want to do it well. Part of that includes self care. When I returned to the classroom, my need to paint was undeniable. After a day of creating tiny activists, I came home and decompressed with a canvas and some paints.

Please check our her studio and art. Its incredible!
Pieces tend to sell out, so snag yours.

In pursuing something less than conventional, did you face any pushback from family, friends or even strangers? If so, how did you deal?

I haven't received any pushback from family and friends in pursuing my passion for art and social justice. In fact, they have encouraged me to do this for many years. My hubs thinks that I should open up an art studio. My sister thinks that I should write a book. Many people have told me to write a book.

What are 3 things that you've gained from doing what you love and perhaps going against the norms?

Three things. It's hard to narrow it down to just three. I learned that painting is a form of therapy for me. When I paint, it allows me to get out everything that I am feeling that I may not have words for. I also learned that it is easier for me to paint for myself rather than for others. When I create something that flows organically it tends to better reflect me and I love it more. That's a huge metaphor for my life. Taking care of myself first isn't always something that has come naturally. Through painting, I have rediscovered self care.

One other thing that I have learned is that small actions can change the world. Sharing my knowledge of social justice and anti-racism helps to transform classrooms. It moves my work beyond my own four walls and makes it accessible to others. Not only that, but with quarantine and social distancing, many families are opting to homeschool. The social justice resources that I create are made so that anyone can pick them up and use them: families, teachers, tutors.

Tell us something about yourself people would be surprised to hear!

I love to travel! I've left the country every year since I was 20 years old. This year has been incredibly difficult because of travel restrictions and COVID-19, so it will be the first time that I’ve stayed in the states since 2000. My plan was to go to Greece to celebrate my 40th birthday, but that will have to wait until next year. So far, I've been to 25 countries. Costa Rica and Peru have been my favorites.

Are there any words of advice you can offer readers who struggle creating their own path?

Just go for it.  If you wait for the moment when everything is perfect, you will be waiting forever.  And above all else, trust yourself.  Everyone will have words of wisdom, but what matters is what you think and how you live your life.

Any favorite mottos or quotes that you live by?

“Every child deserves a champion – an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best that they can possibly be.”  – Rita Pierson.

This includes our inner child. Even though we grow up and mature, we cannot forget about our inner child. Maybe you are your own champion.  Maybe you are a champion for someone else. I have a picture of 5 year old me hanging in my office to remind myself of this quote. My art, my social justice work all harken back to this quote.

Be sure to follow all of Falicia's adventures here:

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Bolding throughout article is my own emphasis.

Filed Under: Not Your Average Gals, Travel

Not Your Average Gal: Jen from Jen on a Jet Plane

August 30, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Not Your Average Gals are kickass, blazing-their-own-path, independent-minded, free-thinking, kind-hearted and all around wonderful humans beings. We learn a lot about ourselves from the people we choose to look to for inspiration or friendship. I'm excited to introduce you to some of them.


World, meet Jen of Jen on a Jet Plane. I became kindred spirits with Jen while living in South Florida and following her life back then of balancing being a full-time lawyer while also traveling the world.

She used to live on the west side of Florida and I’d often see her post about her east side road trips to my side of town. She gave me plenty of things to do even in my own city that I didn’t even know about.

But she doesn’t live in Florida anymore.

In fact, she’s not even practicing law full time anymore.

Get this.

She quit being a full-time lawyer, moved to Puerto Rico and (before COVID) travels for a living educating the masses about how they can work remotely and do the same.

She’s now a #1 Amazon best selling author, TedX speaker and TikTok extraordinaire.

I’m so incredibly grateful Jen is sharing her story with me. She’s most definitely a Not Your Average Gal you’ll enjoy learning from. Let’s go!

Jen Ruiz
Jen on a Jet Plane, Solo Female Traveler & Entrepreneur

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What's your passion—the thing that makes you a Not Your Average Gal?

I love to travel the world solo and on a budget, and help others do the same.

When did you start this passion?

In 2017, I set out to take 12 trips in 12 months while employed full-time as an attorney before my 30th birthday. While I was professionally accomplished, I felt like I was lacking personally since I had failed to acquire a husband or start a family before the milestone birthday.

I’d tried countless dating apps and websites but the interactions all left me feeling depleted and devalued. So instead, I quit dating altogether and focused on making my travel goal a reality.

I ended up taking 20 trips in 12 months, finding deals that were too good to pass up, like a $38 flight to New Zealand and $16 flight to Ecuador. I wrote a book about finding cheap flights that become a #1 Amazon bestseller and 2018 Readers’ Favorite award winner. After that, I decided to quit practicing law and pursue my passion of traveling and writing. I’ve since given a TEDx talk about the power of flying solo, published a second book that cracked Amazon’s top 150 list overall, and have been feature by The Washington Post, Huffington Post and ABC News.

Do you make any income with your business?

My books provide me with a steady stream of passive income through Amazon royalties every month. I launched a companion course on affordable travel that did well and have also worked to monetize my blog by learning more about SEO best practices and increasing organic traffic to my site.

Do you have a “day job” that is different from your passion or business?

I quit my “day job” but I teach English online in the mornings to help pay the bills. It started out as a side gig and then became ideal when I transitioned to the digital nomad life as the pay is reliable and the hours are flexible. I can teach anywhere with decent WiFi. 

What lead you to your current path? (What was your previous job or background or experience that got you to where you are today?)

I used to work at a nonprofit law firm, and I enjoyed my job. I had great coworkers and a sense of purpose. However, I had to fight with people on a daily basis. Not a day would go by that I didn’t get stressed out or irrationally angry, and it didn’t seem sustainable. I practiced law for 5 years before I decided to make the switch. 

In pursuing something less than conventional, did you face any pushback from family, friends or even strangers? If so, how did you deal?

Surprisingly, my friends and family were very supportive. I even had a coworker buy me a book for Christmas about the business of being an author with the inscription, “Go ahead, be happy.” I can’t tell you how much that meant to me. 

What are 3 things that you've gained from doing what you love and perhaps going against the norms?

  1. I’ve learned to enjoy life in all its stages, instead of wishing I could fast forward to the next.
  2. I’ve learned to be happy for my friends instead of resentful or envious that everyone I know is getting married or having a baby except for me.
  3. Lastly, I’ve learned that the world is filled with experiences that can make you feel whole, and that kindness and a smile can surpass all language barriers. 

Tell us something about yourself people would be surprised to hear!

I’m left handed, I took Chinese for three years in high school but can’t speak a lick of it, and I was once invited on stage to be David Copperfield’s magician’s assistance. Hobby-wise, aside from traveling and writing I love to read and get lost in completely non-productive books like a YA series or romance novel. Karen Moning’s fever series got me through law school — it’s a guilty pleasure!

Are there any words of advice you can offer readers who struggle creating their own path?

Focus on what you have instead of what you’re lacking. I didn’t have a boyfriend, husband, children or even dog, but that meant that I had no one to tie me down, no obligations and complete freedom to go wherever I wanted. There’s always an upside if you’re willing to find it. 

Any favorite mottos or quotes that you live by?

“The quicker you let go of old cheese, the sooner you find new cheese.”
– Spencer Johnson, author of “Who Moved My Cheese?”

“The best adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams.”
– Oprah

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
– Mark Twain

Be sure to follow all of Jen's adventures here:

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Bolding throughout article is my own emphasis.

Filed Under: Cambodia, Not Your Average Gals, Travel

Cruise vs. All-Inclusive. The Ultimate Showdown.

July 31, 2020 By Caroline Peterson

Up until 7 years ago, I had not done the cruise thing nor stepped foot in a resort. I know, I know. I lead such a deprived life. Let me tell you, neither of these events were life changing, so if you haven’t done either—it’s cool, you can still sit with us at the lunch table.

That said, I would easily do one of these things time and time again, and the other? Well, it would need to be a great deal, good location or something friends or family had organized for me to partake.

#snottytraveler, engage.

To show I’m not as cynical as the last conversation I had with my therapist would lead you to believe, I’m going to list out the positives of both an all-inclusive resort and a cruise.

Ultimately, what this boils down to is your: travel style.

There are pros and cons to both options, but what you want out of each trip will simply be personal preferences. Like, silver tequila. Who drinks that gold shit? Moving on…

All-Inclusive Resorts

An individualized welcome

Many resorts have a loyalty program, which means you get a separate check-in where they’ll chat with you to confirm details, get to know what you’d like to do and offer any upgrades.

You choose your length of stay

If you only have time for a 3-day stay. Do it. How about 10? Do it. I’ve tried to book for 6 months, but the booking system and for some odd reason, the hubster, said no.

Options to earn points

Many resorts are part of larger hotel programs, which earn you points. But the biggest benefit is, many of these resorts allow you to transfer points from different programs, such as Chase Ultimate Rewards. We transfer our UR points to Hyatt, then book through there. We’ve stayed for super cheap!

All of the food and drinks

Grab your drink and go on a beach walk

Each resorts has several restaurant options from casual buffets to the arduous task of having to put on real shoes to have dinner at the Chef’s Table. Many times, the resorts will have theme nights for certain restaurants so you can plan your meals according to how feisty you’re feeling. Plus, since it’s all-inclusive, you can eat your heart out. There are options for upgrades to better steak or wine for a price, but we’ve never felt it necessary with all the good options.

Explore the local area

Since you’re staying in one place, you’ll have the opportunity to take day-trips around the area or head into the downtown area of the city you’re resort is located. Most all-inclusive resorts will provide you their recommendations for quality tour guides. Some of our fondest memories were from checking out Mayan ruins and eating tacos with locals for the afternoon, without feeling the need to be rushed.

Large pool area

Have you seen the pools at all-inclusives? I’m sure there are exceptions, but in most cases, they are HUGE. These expansive landscapes means you can pee in one side of the pool and never worry your family across the way is wading through it. Wait, what? Nevermind… Mainly the benefit of this means, there’s more seating areas and beach chairs. That gives plenty of people the benefit of not having to play the “reserved seat” game.

Stay in one place

This balcony also had a hammock!

No scheduled meetings or itineraries here! You can literally sit by the pool, margarita in one hand, some terrible romance novel in the other and not speak to a soul or leave if you want to.

Options to relax or go hard

By staying in one place, you get to relax. By the second day at our last all-inclusive my husband said, “So you just want to sit by the pool and read again?” Yes. Yes, I do. We took our optional day trips and even headed into town, so walking back to the resort was always a zen feeling of—Ommmmm, I’m home. But, had we wanted to, there are plenty of options to party-it-out or dancing until you get boob sweat. With a resort, you get to pick your own pace of things and how often or how little you want to do them.

Cruises

Check-in breeze

Both cruises I’ve been on had a nearly flawless, less-than-5-minute check-in process. Sign your name that you’re not going to infect the entire ship with noro-virus and walk right onto the ship to find your room. I’m very curious what the process will be now during COVID travels. Provide a negative test within 72 hours of embarkment?

Loyalty program

All cruise lines have loyalty program and while I’ve never used them or been an advocate for their programs or branded credit cards, some people who only do cruises have a lot of success. So congrats, your current trip will earn you some points!

All of the food and drinks

Baby Not You Average Gal and Hubster

A previous Creative Director of mine described the last cruise he was on as a floating cafeteria. While hysterical, he’s pretty darn accurate. You have tons of options at legitimately any time. There’s buffets and restaurants and quick-eats on every single level of the ship it seems. Oh, and bars too, don’t forget. You will not be fraut for choices here.

Hit many places in one trip

This is the whole point of a cruise…to cruise to new destinations. From 4 days to 14 days, you can hit up as few as 2 cities or islands or as many as a round-the-world cruise will allow! For shorter cruises, you often get the afternoon in a place, but with longer cruises, you can get a day or two in one location.

Options to relax or go hard

Cruises are best shared with friends.

If you want to stay on the ship the entire time and never leave the pool bar, do it. If you want to be up at the butt crack of dawn for some power yoga, then shopping on the streets of Rome, do it! Your presence (aside from the muster drill) is not required at anything.

Itineraries galore

You’ll have hourly options for fun from the moment you set foot on the ship. As part of your check in, you’re handed a big ol’ sheet with columns of goodies. Depending on your cruise line and destinations, you will also be told when you can leave the ship and when you need to be back on it so they don’t leave your late butt behind.

Meet lots of people, for better or worse

You’re on a ship with thousands of people. Everyone is a transplant when in international waters, so for better or worse, you’ll get to know people. We met plenty of fun characters on both our cruises. I’ve heard of friends and family taking cruises that were undersold, but more often than not, these puppies go out to sea with packed with people. (Pre-COVID.)


Maybe you guessed, but when it comes to a vacation choice, my vote will typically be for an all-inclusive resort. Again, as I mentioned above, this is based on my travel style. Some people puffy-heart-love cruises and couldn’t imagine staying in one place for days at a time. Good on them. Or good for her, not for me.

If you think I didn’t give cruises a fair shot, I did, in fact, give it another college try by going on my second cruise and afterwards still felt the same. There are some reasons for this, that again boil down to personal preferences that you can read below.

Pools

My happy place.

Remember how I mentioned cruises pack those puppies with people. Well they all meet at the pool. Finding a refreshing portion of the pool that isn’t bathwater warm or occupied is tough on cruises. Even the pool decks are packed, leaving very few seats available. Yes, you can hang by the pool all day, but weaving in and out of people to get a drink or get to the hot tub isn’t my idea of relaxing. This thought gives me the heebie jeebies during COVID.

An all-inclusive pool at least lets you catch your breath. You often don’t need to wake up to snag a chair and the pools are much bigger than what they can fit on a ship. I spend most of my time at the pool or beach, so being at a resort maximizes this preference.

Food at an all-inclusive is better

I had good meals on my cruises. But I had memorable ones at the all-inclusive resorts we’ve stayed at. When you’re not loading a ship to feed thousands of people each night, the food can be fresher and more local. I know that cruise lines are doing a lot to get in on the farm-to-table movement, but resorts already have a leg up on them because they are in one location and and source from it. I also didn’t feel like a number as much during dinners at all-inclusives. We weren’t being rushed out or fit into a time slot and the specials were different every night.

Wanting to spend more time in one place

With cruises, it often feels like rush, rush, rush, chill, rush back, rush back, rush back. With being chauffeured around from a tender to a taxi, there’s always this feeling that I don’t have enough time. (Probably because it isn’t on my schedule. Control issues.) Not to mention, you’re dealing with thousands of other people wanting to take advantage and spend the most time possible doing the same things as you.

The herding mentality

If you didn’t guess it by the name of this site, I typically don’t go with the grain. The herding mentality of cruise ships is tough for me. Go, go, go! Get in line. Wait here. Okay, now you can move.

You also see the worst of people when they’re packed into smaller spaces, trying to get somewhere. You know what that looks like: pushing, cutting in line, complaining. Often this is because someone isn’t paying attention, which adds to the tension in the atmosphere. I found myself saying a lot, “Get. moving. Come. on.”

The need to do it all & FOMO

Since cruises offer such extensive options when you’re at-port somewhere, passengers are often left feeling like they need leave because you’re on a cruise with that wonderful option. If I’m in relaxing vacation whose sole intention is to chill (read: not climbing temples in Ankor Wat, Cambodia), then I want to do just that and not feel like I’m missing out on a good opportunity and waisting money by not doing it.

Some people are way better at this than me, admittedly. I know people who never get off the ship. But, my traveling heart couldn’t take it if I knew there was a sweet local spot I was missing because my intentions on this trip were to chill out.


At the end of the day, like I’ve mentioned, it boils down to your own personal travel style and preferences. When we get back to traveling, I doubt people will be debating which is better because we’re just going to be so dang excited to get out again! Freedom!

For now though, give us the scoop on which you like best! Are you are cruises or all-inclusive traveler—and why?

Filed Under: Mexico, Travel, Travel Hacking

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