Not Your Average Gal

Copywriter. Content Creator. Constant Sassypants.

Archives for November 2012

Friday Funny: Being Thankful Caroline-Style

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If you access your Facebook account at all during the month of November, you know there is a trend where people will use their status to list something they are grateful for every day of the month. (You know, Thanksgiving.)  It’s intention is pretty innocent and sweet and if I weren’t such a cynical wench I would probably look past the sugar-filled statuses and realize that the world can always use a little more appreciation for the small things.

…but I’m a cynical wench.

Some of these statuses are quite vomit-worthy.  We’re clearly getting to the half-way mark of the month where people are realllllllly reaching into their gratefulness pockets:

Today I’m thankful for the person who cut me off on my way to work.  They made me realize I don’t want to be in such a hurried rush like them and possibly miss what is going on in the wonderful world around me.

Liar.  Admit it.  You totally wanted to punch the person in the face.  It’s okay.

So, in lieu bombarding your newsfeed everyday with statuses that will make you want to toss your cookies, I’ll tell you here about the things I’m thankful for.  Caroline-style.

Caroline is thankful for:

1.  I’m thankful I didn’t roll over in the middle of the night onto my cat’s vomit.  It was a lovely morning present.  Thanks, Bax!
2.  I’m happy the vomit stain came out of the bedsheets and didn’t get below the mattress protector.  Mmmmm.

3.  I’m grateful I haven’t caught Dengue fever from the outbreak here in Florida.

4.  I’m glad one of my BFF’s admitted she didn’t get a pedicure today because she hadn’t shaved her legs in 2 weeks.  Bless you child - we’ve all been there.

5.  I’m happy My Main Squeeze thinks wedding planning is one giant laugh too:

 

Happy (early) Thanksgiving, my beloved readers!

 

Friday Funny: 5 Twitter Accounts You Should Follow

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Tweet. Tweet.  Tweet.

Do you Twitter?  I mean, tweet.  Are you a twitter-er?  I mean, Tweeter.

By social media standards, I joined Twitter pretty late in the game a couple years ago.  I found I’ve enjoyed it way more than I thought I would.  I mean, where else can you simultaneously find out from CNN that Osama bin Laden was killed and also see a fantastic vegetable fajita recipe from Whole Foods?

If you’re not a part of the Twitter community, you should be…at the very least to simply laugh with (or at) the following accounts.

 

5 Twitter Accounts You Should Follow:

 

1.  Oprah reads the news –   @OprahReadsNews 

And you get a car.  And YOU get a car!  And YOU GET A CAR!  EVERRRYYYBODDDDY GETTTSSSS A CAAAAARRRRRRR!!

 

2.  A Milania parody – @TheFauxMilaniaG

Do you watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey?  No?  Oh.  Well neither do I…  But if I did, I would tell you about Teresa’s hysterical daughter Milania.  She’s an unintentional scene stealing diva and I love it.

 

3.  Kit – @blogdangerously

An annonymous blogger that says everything you all are actually thinking.  She’s a business woman with sass and a kick ass momma to boot.  Basically, you want to be her.

 

4.  The Next Martha – @TheNextMartha

If Martha Stewart had a fun-loving, hilarious, non-condescending sister…it would be her.  Plus, she loves Halloween.  So she’s a lady after my own heart.

 

5. Caroline @Caro9er

Shameless. plug.