Not Your Average Gal

Copywriter. Content Creator. Constant Sassypants.

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2015 Goals Update: Halfway Through

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Still here. Chugging along after having to cancel our trip to Southeast Asia.

Now may be a good time to check in and see how those goals for 2015 are going. Don’t you hate when you set goals for yourself only to look back and realize – whoops, gotta get that shit done. I made a post at the beginning of the year of things I want to accomplish. Since we’re halfway through 2015 (!!!), I thought it would be good to check in on what I’ve done…and what I still need to work on.

 

Blog:

Join a blog network and expand readers

I’ve certainly expanded readers. I’m still a bit gun-shy about joining a blog network as I’ve read some things that make me hesitant. Sure, it would be great for increased readership, but often your readers are just in numbers, not necessarily loyalty, if that make sense. I was told once in a blogging seminar, it’s better to have 1000 quality, commenting followers, than 10,000 who don’t actually read your posts. I could also potentially pigeonhole myself into a particular network and I’m about as likely to stay inside the box as Miley Cyrus is at keeping her tongue in her mouth.

Gain more followers on Twitter and Facebook

Check and check.

Choose one medium for all my social networks

I discovered IFTTT and love it. It’s not totally ideal, but it’s a great way of pushing through specifically what I want posted from Instagram to Twitter or FB, as well as links posted on Facebook to Twitter.

Include more videos

I planned on posting videos from our trip, but not all hope is lost. I have some ideas up my sleeve.

Write more about Travel Hacking

Check and check and check.

Gain more freelance writing work

I can happily say I’ve worked on a couple of cool projects. I even created a Work With Me page so you can easily contact me with any work you’d like handled by someone sassy. (Ahem. that’d be me.)

Feature sponsored post, guest writers and perhaps open up advertisements

Guest writer: Check

TerracottaWarriors_WanderlustExplorers

Sponsored post: Ready for it!

Advertisements: Still debating.

 

Life:

Travel somewhere new in July

Ouch. This one hurt a bit. Technically, we should be in Cambodia today. We are taking a long weekend next weekend to somewhere new, which I’ll disclose afterwards. Officially, I will get my hand on a Mai Tai.

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Read a damn book

Sorta check? I’m the worst reader. I’m too busy thinking about my To-Do list. I started reading The Happiness of Pursuit again after the hubster and I hit a massive wall of stress that lead to canceling our trip. It’s a really good book, I highly recommend it.

It gave me some ideas for my next “quest” and has my wheels spinning. I even brought my iPad to work so I could take a freakin’ break and read it during lunch. Has it happened yet? Nope. But baby steps, friends. Baby steps.

Give up TV for one month

Check.

Learn more Spanish

Haven’t used our Rosetta Stone yet, but my coworkers are really working on getting me hip to the lingo. (Does anyone actually say “hip” anymore?) They give nicknames to other people and they’re hysterical. I wonder what mine is? Probably “Muy Caliente.” For sure.

Actually, one of the benefits of reading The Happiness of Pursuit is giving me tips on learning a language in 6 months. It has reinvigorated me. Plus, I’m not starting from zero, I have basic Spanish skills from school. Bueno?

 

Health:

Lose 15 pounds

Meh. This is still very doable. I’m sitting pretty much at the same weight as I was at the start of the year, after losing some pounds when I got a reality check in May.

Incorporate lifting into my workouts

Check. I’ve noticed a big difference in my shoulders and thighs. I appreciate my strength so much more as an adult than when I was an awkward teenager grappling with having a very womanly body at a young age. I value my strength and my legs are really powerhouses…even if they aren’t the skinniest things.

Allow myself to buy pre-packaged meals

Check. Has made lunch at work so much easier. Pre-packed brown rice or quinoa that you can heat in the microwave is a time-saver. Uncle Ben’s and Seeds of Change are great brands.

Run 2 half marathons

1 down. 1 to go. It’s way too hot in Florida during this time of year. In fact, I don’t even know of another distance race in our area until October. I’d love to run the Las Vegas Half Marathon, but that may come up fast for me and I’m doing a good job mending my Achilles’ tendon.

A1A Fort Lauderdale Half Marathon

 

Get up each morning at 6

Check-ish. Do I actually get out of bed? Sometimes? Oh well. Baby steps.

Eat less meat

Check. At the very least, our Taco Tuesdays are usually with vegetables or soy/tofu crumbles and they are dee-lish.

Let go of guilt

Check. It’s a work in progress, for sure. Not a day goes by where I don’t have to give myself a pep talk about something, but that’s okay. I can say I’m so much better than I was last year; can you imagine 2 years from now? Boo-yah.

 

So, I’d say I’ve done pretty darn well, right? What do you guys and gals think? How are you doing on some of your 2015 goals?

Fear Disguised as Practicality

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feardisguisedaspracticality

There is a wonderful speech Jim Carrey gave at Maharishi University of Management’s graduation. I encourage you to watch it in full, but this particular portion below is quite inspiring. Take a moment to watch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajMpfPYlHi4

I’ll wait.

You back?

Good, right?

There are moments in my life where I could have chosen or was well on my way to choosing a more practical path, even if my heart was tugging in a different direction. I vividly remember sitting with my father a couple years after college, going over my finances and budgeting so I could make a down payment on a condo eventually.

“It will be tough. But you’re doing well, kiddo. I’m not worried about you.”

Remember when the economy took a rough tumble? The real estate market crashed. Wall Street threw up over everyone’s stocks. I lost my job. Many people lost their jobs. I could have easily been like so many people, stuck with a mortgage in a shit economy with no hope of selling in the near future.

It was a lucky break. I hadn’t seriously started looking into buying a condo yet when it happened.

Why the heck would I want to do that when I bought my car right after college, instead of leasing, just in case I landed a job abroad and I’d have to break a car lease. Yes, that’s how much I wanted to move back to London after I had my internship there and was forced to come back to the states a broke college grad with an expensive degree to start paying back.

If I couldn’t commit to a 3 year car lease, why the hell would I even look into buying a condo a couple years later then?

Fear.

Fear disguised as practicality.

Real estate was the American Dream. It was what you were supposed to do.

Living abroad again? Where will you settle down if you’re not in the U.S.? What would you do for the holidays? How can you live a fulfilling life without the picket fence and 2.5 kids? Why would you want to do that?

I just knew I did, but the fear of not doing the standard thing tugged at me for a brief moment and I thought I should save for a condo.

Baby Jesus I’m glad it never worked out in hindsight. The universe is such a crazy beast.

My point in all of this is, on many, many different levels society gently whispers and asks you to do the standard thing and if you’re not feeling it, I mean really feeling it…there’s a reason. As Jim Carrey said in that speech, you can still do all the right things, make all the right decisions, provide exactly what is asked of you and you can still get laid off. What a total fucking slap in the face.

You can fail at what you don’t want, so you might as well take a chance at doing what you love.

Do you know how many absurd things I’ve heard in regard to my travels, even this most recent trip coming up?

  • MYANMAR? Why don’t you go somewhere normal?
  • Dogs have rabies there. I hope you don’t come back frothing at the mouth.
  • Southeast Asia again? You guys must really like being weird.
  • You know you could stay home and visit other people instead?
  • You have your whole life to travel. You don’t have to do it now.
  • That seems so extravagant for this point in your life.
  • I wish you wouldn’t go so I don’t have to worry.
  • You must be millionaires. I’d rather spend my money on solid investments.

Thank God we don’t make our travel decisions based on what other people think of us, right?

Hey, buck-o. Same goes for you in any garden-variety decision you may have in your life. There is not one specific path you need to take and settling for the easy way because of money or pressure from the peanut gallery promoting practicality over your own damn way of doing something is just:

fear disguised as practicality.

I’m not saying do anything rash here like jump out of plane without a parachute because that’s a practical thing to wear. That would make you stupid. And dead. I’m saying if people are running their mouths about their own damn fears for you, which are often conveniently disguised as practicality, take it, put it in a little box, wrap a bow on it and toss it under the “Couldn’t Care Less Tree” for someone else to open and carry.

If I listened to every nasty, unsupportive comment said about getting married in England, we wouldn’t have shared a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

If I listened to my grandparents tell me to not build too many castles in the sky, I wouldn’t have taken that life changing internship in London.

If I listened to traditionalists who said we should have a normal wedding registry, we’d never have taken our eye-opening honeymoon to Thailand and Cambodia.

If I listened to Jillian Michaels, I’d have better arms.

Wait a second…

Don’t live your life believing something isn’t possible because it isn’t practical. Conservative choices can still disappoint you.

Dare to ask the universe for what you want. 

One Month: No TV Conclusion

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In March, I decided to give up TV for the entire month and on March 18th, I cracked. I watched the 2 hour reunion of Vanderpump Rules. Worrrrth it.

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Jokes aside, that month taught me a lot about how easily distracted I am by television. The only other time I watched TV all month was watching Michigan State play twice, even though I said I wouldn’t. Oh ahem. GO GREEN! I was honestly surprised they made it that far in the NCAA basketball tournament, so I allowed the exception.

Like an addict.

I think the best way of describing not having TV in my life would be: quiet. I got ready in the morning with just a radio, something I hadn’t done since high school. When the GermanWings plane crashed, I listened to the TV news while I was getting ready (a condition I said I would allow if bad news happened). But I immediately noticed how quickly I was sucked in, standing there, just watching.

Like an addict.

(Ironically, I’m watching Intervention while writing this.)

When April 1st came around, I had basically 10 hours of shows DVRed. 10 HOURS. Did I watch them all so far? Of course. Ha. Except that’s not really funny.

I could have been reading the book I started reading. I could have been dancing in the kitchen while making dinner. I could have planned out future blog posts.

All more productive than watching mindless television and all things I did last month when television wasn’t around.

Things I’ve learned:

  • I’m more aware of how TV can suck me in for 5, 10 or 60 minutes.
  • I can live without it and didn’t miss anything life changing.
  • I can multi-task and watch TV while doing something else, but turning off the TV makes me accomplish that task 10x faster.
  • I have a major Bravo TV addiction.
  • I noticed that without TV other distractions payed a bigger role: Facebook.
  • Reading before bed helped me sleep better.

So there it all is in total honesty.

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Would you be able to give up television or something you know is a total distraction?

My Favorite Things: Beauty Products (and a Giveaway!)

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From time to time, readers ask me what lipstick I’m wearing or what foundation I use. I even get texts from friends asking about it. You guys are a demanding bunch of divas.

I actually wear a lot less makeup than I did in my 20’s. It’s probably a combination of feeling more confident in how I look, not giving a shit what people think and also being a lazy sloth in the morning not wanting to spend more than 5 minutes on it. I actually *gasp* only wear foundation to work once a week when I’m not meeting with clients and impressing them with my copywriting skills and sunshine smile.

So I thought I’d start a “My Favorites” series about my favorite things. <cue Julie Andrews> Let’s start with the beautification process of making me look so damn awesome.

 

Beauty Products

1. St Ives Fresh Skin Apricot Scrub

This has been in my shower since I was in high school. Yes, I’m being serious. This is my stand-by scrub and I only use it 1-2 times a week for my face and neck (and sometimes knees and elbows if they’re extra dry). It’s less than $4 too. Holla atchya girl!

2. R+F Microdermabrasion Paste

My dear friend and former roommate sent this to me as a sample telling me it would make my face feel like a baby’s bottom. (How’s that for a sales pitch?) Shit got real because it totally did! I use this two to three times a month in replacement of the St. Ive’s Apricot Scrub. It’s so damn good. BBS. Baby’s bottom soft. If I’m feeling feisty, I’ll put on R+F Redefine Night Renewing Serum afterwards and wake up like Princess fucking Aurora. Beauty sleep in a bottle, babes.

3. Josie Maran Argan Daily Moisturizer SPF 47

I was introduced to this 5 or so years ago by a sales associate at Sephora when I was looking for a moisturizer with SPF in it that wouldn’t make my skin burn or eyes tear up. My skin is a sensitive bitch, just like my heart. She raved about this and told me just to buy the small sample in case I didn’t like it. Well, I LOVED IT. It’s lightweight and hello SPF 47. Josie Maran has free shipping for anything over $25 too.

4. Bare Minerals Original Broad Spectrum 15 Foundation

I’ve used this for the past 10 years, easy. It’s lightweight and covers well without making you look like a street walker. I used to be a Medium, but have changed to Medium Beige. Damn the Florida sun. I tried Bare Minerals Complexion Rescue recently as my skin was a bit dry from winter and I like it but I’ll go back to the powder after I finish it up.

5. It Cosmetics Vitality Face Disc

This has lasted me over a year and a half. It’s a bronzer and highlighting powder with blush. Somedays I use all, some I use just the blush and other days I don’t use it at all. As in, my face goes commando. Ohhhh, kinky.

6. Laura Mercier Full Blown Volume Supreme Mascara

I have a dilemma most bitches hate me for- my eyelashes are quite long. Frankly, I love them and I don’t say that about many parts of this ol’ body. They are so long that they leave black mascara marks above my eyes because…they are long enough to touch my brow bone. I can feel the death glares now. I found this in my Birchbox one month and became an instant fan. It’s much easier to take off than Benefit’s They’re Real mascara, which was my go-to for years.

7. IT Cosmetics Brow Power Brow Pencil

Don’t you wish your eyebrows would grow as thick as your armpit hair? Gross? Sure. But if there’s a hairy joke line, I’ll cross it. Sometimes I need a bit of a filler to make my brows fuller and this does the trick without making me look like 80’s Madonna. It’s a universal color so anyone can use it and not screw it up. Allegedly.

8. Urban Decay Eyeshadow Primer

I’m not sure if I just have greasy eyelids or what, but whenever I wear eyeshadow I’d get this weird crease in the makeup on my lids. This stuff solved it. One tube will last you a really long time.

9. Coastal Scents Revealed 2 Palette

I change up my eyeshadows the most often (read: once a year) and usually use what Birchbox sends me, especially since they’re small samples and travel well for a girl-on-the-go like me. Hey-o, travelin’ superstar! I liked this one so much that I bought the full size set. It’s similar to Urban Decay’s Naked line, but half the price and just as good.

10. LAQA Lip Lube Pencils

Another find in my Birchbox (are you sensing a trend?) and this really surprised me. I’m not a lipstick gal. I actually wore lipgloss for my wedding and even then someone had to push me to do it. These little puppies pack a punch and keep my lips hydrated, which is often a problem when wearing liptstick. I love the Lambchop and Menatour colors.

Other products:

Right now, I also use Olay Regenerist Advanced Anti-Aging Regeneration Cream Cleanser and Neutrogena Alcohol Free Toner before I put facial cream on at night. That’s usually Oil of Olay Regenerist Micro Sculpting Cream, R+F Redefine Night Renewing Serum or Retin-A.

 

The Giveaway:

The first 15 people to comment below about what’s in their beauty arsenal will get free samples from my dear gal pal, Emily, at R+F. I know what you and your Facebook newsfeed are thinking, sometimes I feel like I need to teach a few R+F gals some marketing skills– bombarding my newsfeed with how omg! wonderful! great! a product is isn’t selling something, it actually creates something called consumer fatigue.

I digress…

Emily isn’t like that. In fact, I bought an R+F product last year and it wasn’t right for my particular sensitive skin. She never got pushy, never bombarded my email asking if I wanted anything more. I just told her last week about how “pink” my skin is and she simply described one product she loves and the ingredients in it. (She knows her stuff.) I’m so excited to try it! (Update: the Soothe step #2 is awesome.) For sanity’s sake, everything has a 60-day money back guarantee if you don’t like it, even if you’ve used all of the product.

But you’re getting free samples to try, so everyone wins! I’ll contact the 15 winners via email.

Now go ahead and share in the comments– what are your go-to beauty products?

Disclosure shit: If you purchase one of the products sold on Amazon through these links, I get a small commission at no extra cost whatsoever to you. As always, these are truly the products that I use and recommend. 

Enjoy Your Hollow Chocolate Bunny

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Remember when the holidays could be THIS exciting?

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I still react like that to chocolate, let’s not lie. (My sister is giving her best “Not Impressed” face.)

So often we get wrapped up in holiday planning and logistics that we forget all you need is a hollow chocolate bunny to be happy. The hubster and I are heading across the state today for holiday festivities, plus I’ve been going to the gym extra early to avoid the gross grunting crowd, putting in a lot of hours at work and then just crashing in bed when I get home in a drool-filled induced sleep. It doesn’t exactly put me in the Easter spirit.

Then I came across the above picture and although I may not remember that moment (or interesting haircut), I do know feeling pure joy and apparently it’s wrapped up in the shape of a chocolate Easter bunny.

I’m going sit back and embrace that this weekend.

Enjoy your hollow chocolate bunny this weekend too, folks!

“Why are you here?”

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I will never forget that question, because I couldn’t quite find a good answer. In the spring of 2007, I was driving back to the office with a coworker after an absurd meeting with a client. She had recently started at our small Michigan agency and I was explaining my background, which included having an internship in London for 6 months. She asked me a bit about it because she loved to travel as well.

I’m sure my eyes lit up when speaking for my love of London or all things British. I still swoon for those rolling English hills and I was just there 2 years ago. Or maybe I started mumbling about how I was supposed to meet Prince William then but it never worked out. Either way, I must have left an impression because she caught me quite off-guard.

“Why are you here, Caroline?”

I couldn’t give a good enough answer. I couldn’t think of a solitary reason…why I was here. Not even my now ex-boyfriend was a reason for me to stay and deep down I knew that.

I stumbled over my words and ended up just saying, “I don’t know.”

I kind of wanted to punch the bright-eyed newbie in her pretty face for making me question my life so much in the blink of an eye.

I just didn’t know why.

The project management job I had at that marketing agency didn’t provide a viable path for advancement (obviously) and ultimately, it wasn’t what I wanted to be doing. Sure I had ideas of what I wanted to do, but more often than not, I knew what I didn’t like…and I was doing just that.

I accepted a job offer about a year after that innocent gal dared to asked me why I was still in Michigan. It seemed a step in the right direction, but I quickly saw it wasn’t a good fit.

Like most people though, I didn’t do much about it. I was being paid well enough. The now hubster and I were looking into various countries to visit and dreaming of adventures. Egypt was at the top of our list. I was keeping myself busy by imagining what else was out there.

Instead of seeking out what would really fulfill me and not just what was comfortable, you know what really made me reevaluate my life?

I got laid-off.

Me and 20% of the company. (And a huge part of Metro-Detroit.)

BAM! An entire auto-industry, in the shitter. Here’s your severance package. Here’s your office stuff. Thanks for playing.

You aren’t supposed to feel a mixture of relief and bitterness as you walk back to your car and swipe your parking pass through the gate one last time. But I did.

My heart couldn’t let me go back to that dynamic. It’s hard to describe to people who so fervently dismiss exploring your dreams for something more consistent and comfortable. But I knew it wasn’t for me. Sure the paycheck was, but that sort of grind wasn’t. Not one that sucked my soul and creativity.

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At a crossroads, I chose to be perpetually poor for years and decided to go back to school for broadcast and media arts, something I always wanted to explore more. If I’m being honest, I still debate to this day as I pay back my student loans if it was worth it, as I’m sure many of you do. Sure I gained great skills, but nothing tangible besides my freelance work was panning out afterwards.

I was in a holding pattern of part time jobs, school and freelance work that weren’t career paths while the hubster applied for medical schools. I kept writing here, in retrospect, probably as an outlet. I knew there was an end. I held onto that little fleck of life until I squeezed every last bit of hope out of it I could.

When we moved down to Fort Lauderdale 2.5 years ago, much to the husband’s chagrin and our bank accounts, I stuck to my guns about jobs I would apply for. With a decade of marketing experience, I could mold myself into a lot of positions that were similar to what I had done before. But I knew I would be miserable, eventually. I had to trust my gut, even at the behest of more arguments.

When I applied for my current job as a copywriter that involved enough writing to make my heart swell, I knew I had found a solid direction and I was right where I needed to be. All my marketing experience and each track I’ve taken in between had conspired to get me here. I also work with people who say fuck a lot. So, basically, I’m right where I need to be.

Today, I’m happy at my job (more often than not) and I’ve worked really hard to set up a life that allows for traveling around the world just for funzies. Something my heart desperately, desperately needs. And also something that the former “comfortable” life didn’t leave much room for.

Now if I can write about my travels, we’d be set. Oh wait, that’s what this here blog is.

What is my point in this little, cushy feel-good story?

Don’t let some pretty, fresh-faced college grad make you question your life. Take the reigns and ask yourself now, “Why are you here?” If you can’t find a good answer, get crackin’!

Even if that means you stumble along the way, you take jobs that are below your pay grade, you volunteer in something that’s interested you for years, take a class you’ve been meaning to try or even if you are left looking back wondering if you should have tried something different. Who cares? Try it. I’m a prime example of trying it and it working out.

I questioned myself nearly every step of the way. The tauntings of the comfortable life while we were flat broke left me wondering if this direction I was going was right or justified. I looked at the hubster and felt pure and utter guilt. I kept the easy way at bay when some days I just wanted the easy answer. Sure there are aspect of my every day job that are quite “normal”, but I set it up on my terms and waited for something that felt right, not just comfortable.

I’m not just a bumbling mess when having to explain why I’m here.

I did it. I dug my fake leopard heels in and did it. That’s why.

Why are you here if not to experience this wonderful life as you see fit?

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